Observations at the end of month 10

My kitchen faucet has the hottest water on the face of the planet. It's like molten lead coming out of that spigot.

Getting water on the footbed of your ghetto house slipper and then walking around is not safe for someone with no balance.

I am no good at washing silverware.

The 10 second rule does not apply to any floor in my apartment.

I need to figure out a way to not be such a violent sleeper.

Leg hair grows 6 times faster in the heat and humidity of high summer in the tropics.

It takes 125 seconds to fill up a 5 liter jug of water from a hand pump, the same amount of time it takes to heat 8 ounces of milk for a cup of Nescafe instand Cafe con Leche.

"I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" is no longer fit for consumption after 4 1/2 months in a refrigerator that was without power for 4 days mid way through.

You can't know how much you rely on running water until you live without it's consistancy for nearly 3 months.

Not all cockroaches are passive/aggressive.

No matter how long that cord stretches from my wall to my telephone, I am going to trip over it at least twice a day.

I am afraid of the dark.

The people that live upstairs from me must not have thumbs because they cannot seem to hold onto anything.

It is next to impossible to get a taxi between 7 and 7:30 pm on Avenida La Costa any given weekday.

The more I shower the more I sweat.

There is no trick to walking on a moving bus. You are always going to look like an asshole if you haven't found a seat prior to the bus driver hitting the gas again.

People who say the gray in your hair looks blond are just trying to make you feel better.

Just choose the least expensive anti-perspirant; they all fail.

My eyelids are the first thing on my body to start sweating.

I am beginning to wonder if my Mom was lying about when I was born, because my horoscope is never right.

Age is really no longer an issue for me.

If you just don't look in the small dark places, you will never see the spider webs.

Never wear flip flops if it has rained. Not even for just a couple of minutes.

If there is a pasty-faced old white guy in the bar, he is going to approach me.

No matter what kind of product I use, there is no avoiding looking like a Q-Tip.