A kick in the attitude

Going to work these days is almost excrutiating. I was in a great mood this morning when I got up, showered, did the whole leave-the-house-drive-to-Starbucks-drive-to-work thing, as great as I can on a Monday, and the minute I walk in the office, BLAM, it hits. People are nervous, snappy, and clearly unhappy. Isn't what we do hard enough that we don't need skittish coworkers sizing you up and silently comparing themselves to you in terms of value to the company? Good Lord. By 8:15 I had a splitting headache. I don't ever get sick but I felt the beginnings of a cold coming on later in the day, based on pure exhaustion from fighting the negativity that hangs over that office like mosquito netting. Fuck.

I thought I would blog again today, not only to help Heather, even though that's a big part of it, but also because a while back I chewed everyone out for not updating regularly and now I am guilty of the same thing. And for what? Am I going to let my work life completely control me? No. I need to blog, even if it is about nothing. If nothing else it is therapeutic. And God knows I need that.

Anita commented about my volunteer work, and I appreciate that comment, because she's right - I can't really look at it as if it is one more chore to do when the day is ending. I have to look at it as helping out the cause for the greater good and all that. It really is in the attitude, and after reading her comment I kind of snapped out of it. I really am letting the work thing affect me, and it's getting into cracks that it doesn't need to be in. It is what it is, leave it at the office. Put your whole heart into everything else, for the right reasons, and quit being such a downer!

Thanks for kicking me in the arse, Anita. I really needed it.