How do you not like ME?! - Bonus 2nd post in one day

Wait I just remembered something. So the other day at work someone told me they met someone who DOESN'T LIKE ME. I was stunned! And amused, by the way, but this person who DOESN'T LIKE ME didn't know that the person who told me actually is a friend of mine. And of course he wasn't giving that up til he got the whole scoop. Apparently she DOESN'T LIKE ME because of a) the "quality" of my previous desk, and b) the fact that I have left the company and returned twice in the last few years. All really good reasons. Back in the day I had a heavy lender desk, and so consequently a lot of my business involved subprime loans - foreclosure and bankruptcy bustouts, no-doc stated income products, stuff like that. I guess because I closed that stuff I must be completely responsible for it, right? I mean, by the time a loan gets to me, the borrowers have been completely convinced by their loan officers that it is the best deal for them. Let me explain in simple terms what the role of an escrow officer is in Oregon: A NEUTRAL THIRD PARTY. So long as I am following all instructions and am convinced that the borrower sitting in front of me is the actual guy who owns the house, I am pretty much at the end of my responsibility. Now granted, if the loan officer is sitting at the table WITH the borrower and he is holding, say, a buck knife or a semi automatic weapon at the borrower's head while the borrower reconsiders, yeah, I have a responsibility to sense that perhaps the borrower is being coerced into signing. But remember that whole concept of free will? Yeah, um, these people have been fully disclosed way before I ever entered the picture, and to date I have seen no weapons in my signings.

So, girl who DOESN'T LIKE ME (and this time it had nothing to do with my two year old sweaters), just because I closed very good numbers monthly, bonussed enough to be able to finance over a year in another country without having to work, and came back (twice) based upon not only my abilities as an escrow officer but my sparkling wit and warm personality, do not be a hater. You can admit that you're jealous. I have met you exactly twice. You have no room to tell people you don't like me. Odds are good the people you are telling DO like me and will probably report that back to me, since they know I will be amused. And, you know, shocked, because, shit, how do you not like ME? Blows me away. And just makes me want to work harder to make you NOT LIKE ME MORE.