Planes, trains, automobiles, j - oh for Pete's sake, the END

Shit just keeps getting in the way.

So where was I?

So Saturday morning, we drove home from The Dells, and stopped on the way at Marita's parents' dairy farm. Have I mentioned that most of Wisconsin appears to be farm country? And that there is a cheese factory on every corner? So I met her parents, and we took a little tour of the barn and the shed where the barn kitties were. They leave little dishes of milk out for the barn kitties, and on this particular occasion the flies were swarming. So upon walking into various and sundry outbuildings, we had to walk through enormous swarms of flies, so much so that you couldn't, like, talk, or laugh, or smile even, without winding up with a mouthful. Many many MANY flies. It was fine, you know, I mean, I wasn't grossed out (the theory being that if I am in THEIR territory, it's doable, but if all these flies were in my apartment I would be catatonic in about 3 seconds), and the bull was enormous. It was actually pretty cool since I haven't been even remotely near anything farm or ranchlike in some years, and I kinda dig that sort of thing. After bidding our farewell, we returned to Sammy Jo Circle.

We still had plenty to do. Dave and his friends killed a pony keg the night before, but the tent was up, the dj equipment was almost finished, the tiki bar, the big barrell tables with the umbrellas and lights were all up - it looked like a party. Of course I have pictures of NONE of this, because, well, because I just forget I have a camera most of the time. We made a quick list of items needed (Marita's prescriptions and some more Christmas lights) and headed for my first Walmarts appearance since the day before I left Cancun. This one had a Subway.

Basically the rest of the day consisted of having sandwiches and losing the car (seriously. To the point where we were like standing in the parking lot and going, well, where is it? What ... do we do? like complete dorks because we were still kinda dazed from the night before), cutting up the dessert bars and ham and cheese roll up thingies, and sort of muddling through the afternoon. Dave and Marita gave me a REALLY NEATO MUG that commemorated the occasion (I have that, and I have a camera, and I should probably just take a dang picture of it and post it), so I tested the beer and irritated Dave til he finally made the booze run. People started showing up around 4:30 which inspired us to go put decent clothing on, and the festivities began.

So here was the party: a whole bunch of really seriously nice people who like to drink beer (and liquor) in mass quantities and tell really funny stories, and listen to my stories and laugh at them. Dave telling me the only answers are "yes" and "no" when it comes to an offer of a Jaeger bomb. Me getting scared and thinking that if I say "no" he won't ask again, so saying "yes" many, many times. Good dj music that wasn't too loud and was surprisingly not all that God-awful heavy metal crap Dave listens to. Doing something I can't even remember that earned me a reward of a shot of Lumpy's Southern Comfort. Getting the dirt on FuckinJoe's new girlfriend before anyone else. Sharing said dirt. Calling Waupun "Waupoon" from here on out. Muscle cars. Bratwurst barbecued then soaked in beer and onions (PHEEEE-NOMENAL). The blow up tiki cooler thing that looked like a penis. Getting updates on the Duck game and having Badger fans run outside to tell me when the Ducks scored. Jello shots. That gosh darned addictive butterscotch stuff. The police coming and me thinking he was a stripper. Him coming back and saying he got four more complaints in the time it took him to get to the end of the cul-de-sac. The fire pit thingie on the lawn, sitting in lawn chairs wrapped in a comforter because it is FREEZING and drinking Jack and Coke because we ran out of beer. Whoever the hell that guy was in my bed (I swear to God nothing could have ever happened, I was just too tired to argue) and Dave throwing him out. Going to bed around 4am.

Waking up at around 10.

The front of the house where the party was was a mess, and there was sticky stuff spilled over by the tiki bar that was attracting bees like mad. We considered cleaning it up, and kind of started (I watched), but then decided we should go get some grub. We had lunch and then took a drive around the town of Fond du Lac. Who knew there was a lake? And a big one, at that? It's actually a very cute town. We even got frozen custard, a thing I haven't had since I lived in Cuyahoga Falls in the mid 90s, and finally went home and played with the cats and watched TV and napped. When the sun started to go down, and the bees started to clear out, we continued the clean up (lots of watching on my part) in the front yard and managed to get garbage in the proper receptacles and put the tables and stuff away. At around 10:45 for some reason we thought we needed Taco Bell. Sunday was a good day because there were no Jaeger bombs involved and it was sunny and lazy enough to feel good about being productive.

Sadly on Monday I had to go, and Dave was going to Maryland, so after a big incident with the bees swarming around the garbage and trying to get in the van and GETTING in the van and me freaking out and Dave needing to pick me up in the middle of the street on account of all the flipping bees, we took off back to Marita's work, and then over to Dave's shop, and then finally to the airport. Had some lunch, said goodbye sort of mistily, and flew home without crashing or circling anything. Marshy picked me up, we went and had sushi, and now, a week later, the suitcase is still in the middle of my living room. I now officially have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to look forward to.

I hope the wait was worth it, and Marita I hope I gave it justice. I really had a great time on my little jaunt and if you are throwing one next year I may just have to come on over again. The midwest United States is definitely a different world, and I mean that in a good way. I am not sure if I could move back there, but it sure is worth the visit.